Get QuoteDark Inspirational Quotes App

" I don't think women are better than men, I think men are a lot worse than women. "

Related Quotes:

" When I was first divorced, I started dating younger women, and it was really exciting. But after a while I was like, 'This is just dumb.' "

" I wish I could know everything ever, like that would be my wish - that's what I hope heaven is, that they tell you who shot JFK and all that stuff. "

" For my scale, how I grew up and live my life, I'm making plenty of money. "

" I don't have a brother in real life. "

" Pushing the envelope' sort of implies that you're inside the envelope with everyone else, and you're trying to find the edges on the outsides. "

" I thought about going to NYU film school - that was this ideal to me. But I didn't make any kind of grades in high school. "

" When I take my kids out for dinner or lunch, people smile at us. "

" The problem is, the more famous you get, the more people see you who didn't choose to. "

" Comedy isn't polite and it isn't correct and it isn't accurate, even. It's just a mess. So that's the way that I approach it. "

" I'm not motivated to entertain people through Twitter, so just by having Twitter and not saying anything, I make people mad. "

" It's kind of awkward to eat alone in a restaurant because everybody's looking at me. "

" I'm bored' is a useless thing to say. You live in a great, big, vast world that you've seen none percent of. "

" It's easier to cancel a show if it's expensive. "

" You can't cancel my stand-up tours. It's impossible. There's too many separate bosses. There is no 'bosses.' "

" Some things I think are very conservative, or very liberal. I think when someone falls into one category for everything, I'm very suspicious. It doesn't make sense to me that you'd have the same solution to every issue. "

" Life isn't something you possess. It's something you take part in, and you witness. "

" I don't know what it's like to be an actor, where if your show gets canceled, really you're just a bum. "

" If I do something for my kids, I get a medal, because most fathers don't. "

" The only pitch I have to movie people is the same as this one: Just give me $8 million. I'm not telling you what it's about and I'm not telling you who's in it. "

" I could never sit down and write jokes. "

" I don't believe in this idea of, 'That's hate speech, stop it.' "

" I was a nerd growing up, and I'm a little antisocial and awkward. "

" To me, art supplies are always okay to buy. "

" A household name is like ketchup. Everybody wants ketchup. Ketchup doesn't hurt anybody. "

" If you're a woman and a guy's ever said anything romantic to you, he just left off the second part that would have made you sick if you could have heard it. "

" Whenever I've encountered a Christian saying, 'Why don't you stop talking like that so I can hear you?' I think, 'Well you're the one putting the earmuffs on, but I wish you could hear me because I like you.' "

" There's two kinds of press that you get when you put out a TV show: The reviews, and the people that just decide what the reviews say. "

" I've learned from experience that if you work harder at it, and apply more energy and time to it, and more consistency, you get a better result. It comes from the work. "

" Perception is created and twisted so quickly. "

" When two kids are being completely berserk, and they're naked and throwing food around, sometimes I just let it go because I can see a future where they're going to be dressed, and they're going to be at school. So I kind of let stuff go sometimes. "