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" It's funny how a chubby kid can just be having fun, and people call it entertainment! "

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" I'm funny on camera sometimes. In life, once in a while. Once in a while. "

" I'm a Twitter addict. Jose Andres is a serial tweeter. It's funny to see which chefs have embraced it, and the different paths they take. "

Anthony Bourdain

" If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor. "

" There is always something funny going on between scenes with Adam Sandler. He's always cracking jokes and yelling at people for no reason. It's pretty funny. He'll joke around during scenes, too. When he guest-starred on 'Jessie,' there was nothing in the script that he said first take. "

" May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. "

" A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. "

" Tell me I'm beautiful, it's nothing. Tell me I'm intellectual - I know it. Tell me I'm funny, and it's the greatest compliment in the world anyone could give me. "

" I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. "

" Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt, not swallowed. "

" You know Nashville, there's people that are ten times more talented than me, ten times better singer than me, song writer than me, but for some reason you get the ball and now - and now you run with it. And you do the best you can. "

" Do not let a flattering woman coax and wheedle you and deceive you; she is after your barn. "

" Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die. "

" But I really like hosting, I think it's a strength of mine. It allows me to improvise, and I love the spontaneity of that, and I think I'm funny behind the desk when interviewing someone. "

Garry Shandling

" Scenes change all the time. Scenes will change while you're shooting them, and you just have to roll with it 'cause that's what makes it funny. It's not being stuck in your character and how you're gonna do something, but to react to other people and to really have a real-life conversation. "

" Being funny is one of my greatest strengths. I can make girls smile when they're down, and when they're having a good time, I can carry on the joke. "

" Ignoring fame was my rebellion, in a funny way. I was insistent on being normal and doing normal things. It probably wasn't advisable to go to college in America and room with a complete stranger. And it probably wasn't wise to share a bathroom with eight other people in a coed dorm. Looking back, that was crazy. "

" There's one thing about baldness, it's neat. "

" When I was born I owed twelve dollars. "

George S. Kaufman

" I think a lot of stuff I find funny is from day dreaming. "

" It usually takes two people a little while to learn where the funny buttons are and testy buttons are. "

" I comment on my friends' things; whatever they post, I post funny posts. I don't post anything that's too sad or mad, or at least not for too long. And I'm usually just a happy person! Silly - people would describe me as silly and crazy and fun. "

" Every man has a sane spot somewhere. "

Robert Louis Stevenson

" One picture is worth 1,000 denials. "

Picture Is Worth

" All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific. "

" If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question? "

" TV is chewing gum for the eyes. "

Frank Lloyd Wright

" If I were to insult people and mean it, that wouldn't be funny. "

" It's a funny old world. "

Margaret Thatcher

" It's a funny thing that when a man hasn't anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married. "

" Funny thing is that the poorer people are, the more generous they seem to be. "