Get QuoteDark Inspirational Quotes App

" No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation. "

Related Quotes:

" Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football. "

" Food is an important part of a balanced diet. "

" Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. "

" Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat. "

" Humility is no substitute for a good personality. "

" Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast, the disk jockey is not allowed to talk. "

" Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky. "

" Andy Warhol made fame more famous. "

" Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra. "

" Designer clothes worn by children are like snowsuits worn by adults. Few can carry it off successfully. "

" In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra. "

" Polite conversation is rarely either. "

" Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq. "

" Do not, on a rainy day, ask your child what he feels like doing, because I assure you that what he feels like doing, you won't feel like watching. "

" All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable. "

" I never met anyone who didn't have a very smart child. What happens to these children, you wonder, when they reach adulthood? "

" Having been unpopular in high school is not just cause for book publications. "

" The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting. "

" You're only as good as your last haircut. "

" Original thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born to people you could not have possibly met. "

" Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying. "

" Nature is by and large to be found out of doors, a location where, it cannot be argued, there are never enough comfortable chairs. "

" Vegetables are interesting but lack a sense of purpose when unaccompanied by a good cut of meat. "

" Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is therefore both unseemly and unproductive to irritate the situation by making an effort. If you have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, simply eat something sweet and the feeling will pass. "

" The conversational overachiever is someone whose grasp exceeds his reach. This is possible but not attractive. "

" Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try. "

" My favorite animal is steak. "

" Don't bother discussing sex with small children. They rarely have anything to add. "

" To put it rather bluntly, I am not the type who wants to go back to the land; I am the type who wants to go back to the hotel. "

" Scientists - the crowd that for dash and style make the general public look like the Bloomsbury set. "