Home
Authors
Tags
App
Get QuoteDark Inspirational Quotes App
" When you're in comedy, people always come up and say, 'Oh, it must be so hard.' It really isn't hard unless you're not good at it. If you can do it, its really kind of fun and easy. "
Jerry Seinfeld
You
Good
Fun
Related Quotes:
" A lot of advertising has gotten worse. I think it's kind of lost its nerve, to be honest with you. I feel like the advertising of the '60s, they were nervier. You know why? Because there was less at stake. "
Jerry Seinfeld
You
Advertising
Know
" Taking in a baseball game on TV is also a big treat. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Treat
Taking
Game
" It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. "
Jerry Seinfeld
World
Amazing
Every Day
" I won't do something unless I can get at least two or three good laughs out of it. If I can't, it's not gonna make the team. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Out
Two
Three
" I like definitive things. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Things
Definitive
Like
" Men don't care what's on TV. They only care what else is on TV. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Men
Care
Only
" Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem. Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Now
Problem
Think
" The truth is, I had always wanted to be a comedian, but I really didn't have that kind of personality, and it's a terrifying thing to say. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Truth
Truth Is
Kind
" There are very few people who really appreciate my shows. People come to the show and they pay and they enjoy it, but I don't really think most people really understand what they've seen. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Show
Think
Appreciate
" The Internet offers opportunities that are more unique than ever before. With TV, I know I'm making 22 minutes; I know there's a commercial in the middle. With the Internet, no one knows anything. No rules. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Unique
Know
Opportunities
" People who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Who
Deserve
Lied
" I think of myself more as a sportsman than I do an artist. "
Jerry Seinfeld
I Think
Artist
Myself
" You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.' "
Jerry Seinfeld
See
Birthday
Cake
" There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, 'I know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked.' "
Jerry Seinfeld
Know
Think
Men
" I think it's funny to be delicate with subjects that are explosive. "
Jerry Seinfeld
I Think
Think
Delicate
" I've done a number of Super Bowl ads. And that is the best advertising of the year. That is when people realize they're going to be compared directly against other ads. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Done
Realize
People
" If you go to a bad movie, it's two hours. If you're in a bad movie, it's two years. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Bad
Go
Hours
" If you're a surfer, you just want to surf. You don't know if anyone's going to see you, and you don't really care if they see you. You just live for that feeling. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Care
Know
Live
" The greatest thing about being a comedian is knowing other comedians. And you get to talk to them. Its the most fun. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Knowing
You
Talk
" A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Funny
You
Having
" Funny is the world I live in. You're funny, I'm interested. You're not funny, I'm not interested. "
Jerry Seinfeld
World
Not Interested
Live
" I prefer the old theaters because the audience is... trapped. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Audience
Because
Old
" The Four Levels of Comedy: Make your friends laugh, Make strangers laugh, Get paid to make strangers laugh, and Make people talk like you because it's so much fun. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Comedy
Friends
Laugh
" You can be passionate about anything. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Anything
Passionate
You
" If you get something right, you really feel it, right in your chest, on stage. I think it's an incomparable experience. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Get
You
Think
" You spend so much time in the world of virtual that the actual - which nothing is more actual than stand-up - it's a painful experience for the audience, and the comedian a lot of time - we miss that. "
Jerry Seinfeld
World
You
Time
" I can walk through a hotel lobby and watch people at the desk and see what they're doing. People don't look at me. They don't even know I'm there. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Doing
Walk
People
" We've fallen into a trap of ever-widening orbits of contact, and there is a total disregard for the present moment. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Present
Present Moment
Contact
" A lot of times, you could play me just the laughs from my set, and I could tell you, from the laugh, what the joke was. Because they match. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Me
Joke
Play
" I like money, but it's never been about the money. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Never
Money
Like