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" There's no such thing as a cheap laugh. "
Louis C. K.
Thing
Cheap
Laugh
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" When I got divorced, I thought 'Well, there goes my act.' "
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" I never viewed money as being 'my money' I always saw it as 'the money.' It's a resource. If it pools up around me then it needs to be flushed back out into the system. "
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" A lot of TV is put together by teams, by writing staffs and several different directors. It's a great, very smart way to make television. It's worked for however long TV's been around. "
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" I love comedians. They're my community. "
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" For my scale, how I grew up and live my life, I'm making plenty of money. "
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Money
Life
" Everything that people say is testable. "
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" I've met a lot of people who've lost their jobs and they still have a sense of humor. "
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" I spend enough time onscreen looking hangdog and depressed. "
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" I would rather be with my kids than anybody else. "
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" A household name is like ketchup. Everybody wants ketchup. Ketchup doesn't hurt anybody. "
Louis C. K.
Ketchup
Hurt
Anybody
" If you're a woman and a guy's ever said anything romantic to you, he just left off the second part that would have made you sick if you could have heard it. "
Louis C. K.
Said
Sick
Woman
" When two kids are being completely berserk, and they're naked and throwing food around, sometimes I just let it go because I can see a future where they're going to be dressed, and they're going to be at school. So I kind of let stuff go sometimes. "
Louis C. K.
Future
I Can
Food
" To me, art supplies are always okay to buy. "
Louis C. K.
Okay
Supplies
Always
" When I was first divorced, I started dating younger women, and it was really exciting. But after a while I was like, 'This is just dumb.' "
Louis C. K.
Started
Women
Dating
" I wish I could know everything ever, like that would be my wish - that's what I hope heaven is, that they tell you who shot JFK and all that stuff. "
Louis C. K.
You
Heaven
I Wish
" You have to be aware of who you're talking to in an audience. "
Louis C. K.
Talking
You
Who
" If I owned a network, I would never let a guy just put people on without telling me who they are. "
Louis C. K.
Me
Guy
Just
" Anytime you see a bit where some stranger does something to me, it's me. "
Louis C. K.
Something
Me
You
" I don't think women are better than men, I think men are a lot worse than women. "
Louis C. K.
Better
Women
Think
" Comedy isn't polite and it isn't correct and it isn't accurate, even. It's just a mess. So that's the way that I approach it. "
Louis C. K.
Comedy
Correct
Even
" I grew up watching all these crazy movies, European movies and stuff, and I guess that I always laughed at things that were a little more offbeat. "
Louis C. K.
Crazy
Watching
More
" I was a nerd growing up, and I'm a little antisocial and awkward. "
Louis C. K.
Growing Up
Little
Up
" I think you have to try and fail, because failure gets you closer to what you're good at. "
Louis C. K.
Fail
Think
Good
" I've always loved boxing. It's something I've always been extremely excited about. "
Louis C. K.
Excited
Loved
Boxing
" I think one reason TV has always done well is because there is something comforting where you kind of know what you're going to be taken through. "
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You
Always
Think
" Some entertainers don't pay attention to what's going on around them. "
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Attention
Going
Pay Attention
" You know, the people who do indie film and decide who gets those little budgets? They're mean, man. They're cold and very cool-oriented. "
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Know
Mean
Film
" Perception is created and twisted so quickly. "
Louis C. K.
Quickly
Created
Twisted
" You can't direct without a good crew. "
Louis C. K.
Crew
Direct
You
" Whenever I've encountered a Christian saying, 'Why don't you stop talking like that so I can hear you?' I think, 'Well you're the one putting the earmuffs on, but I wish you could hear me because I like you.' "
Louis C. K.
Saying
Think
Me