Home
Authors
Tags
App
Get QuoteDark Inspirational Quotes App
" I don't deserve any credit for turning the other cheek as my tongue is always in it. "
Flannery O'Connor
Always
Tongue
Funny
Related Quotes:
" If I were to insult people and mean it, that wouldn't be funny. "
Don Rickles
Were
People
Mean
" When I was born I owed twelve dollars. "
George S. Kaufman
Funny
Born
Dollars
" Being funny with a funny voice is more my comfort zone, a broader character that I try to humanize, a kind of silly or wacky persona that I try to fill in. "
Hank Azaria
Character
Comfort Zone
Funny
" I went out with seven actors in a row. There are problems with that. I've had the really good-looking dramatic actor, and that has its problems. And then I'll go out with the funny guy. It's almost like the funny guy has more to prove. "
Jennifer Coolidge
Funny
Go
Good-Looking
" I'm a funny guy. You've got to be able to make fun of yourself. We only live once. "
Jon Pardi
Funny
Yourself
You
" It's been very funny to try to act like an adult. Even getting dressed. Every day, I'm like, 'Should I wear a blazer and walk around with an umbrella? Do I carry a briefcase?' Because I'm trying to be some image of the adults I saw on TV growing up. "
John Mulaney
Growing Up
Funny
Day
" I think since I was kid people told me that they thought I was funny. "
Demetri Martin
Funny
Kid
Me
" Chris Hemsworth is like Christopher Reeve in that he can do two things: he can wear a big red cape without a shred of self-consciousness. But he's also funny as hell, and he's so sweet. So with all the fish-out-of-water stuff, he's so funny. So he does almost two jobs in a way. "
Tom Hiddleston
Funny
Sweet
Hell
" You know the funny thing, I don't get along with rich people. I get along with the middle class and the poor people better than I get along with the rich people. "
Donald Trump
Funny
You
Rich
" I was flying with my brother, and he challenged me to work out on the airplane. He thought it was funny - and I did it! "
Izabel Goulart
Flying
Work
Funny
" I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well. "
Robert Benchley
Know
Great
Nothing
" Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving. "
Erma Bombeck
Keeps
Gift
Giving
" I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known. "
Walt Disney
Woman
More
Mickey Mouse
" Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them. "
P. G. Wodehouse
Restaurant
Best
Funny
" I'm going to marry a Jewish woman because I like the idea of getting up Sunday morning and going to the deli. "
Michael J. Fox
Marry
Funny
Up
" It is better to be young in your failures than old in your successes. "
Flannery O'Connor
Your
Young
Than
" I don't mean to be funny. "
Yogi Berra
Funny
Mean
" Maybe people don't see me as believable playing a person of today. I guess I'm just more realistic in a corset and funny hairstyles. "
Katie McGrath
Today
Funny
People
" Forty for you, sixty for me. And equal partners we will be. "
Joan Rivers
Me
Funny
Forty
" It's funny, I get a little quieter with time. I don't want to chase my tail and one day repeat myself and repeat myself and one day have kids going to college and not have memories that I should, because I was too busy doing my thing. "
Dave Matthews
Time
Myself
Memories
" Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. "
Margaret Mead
Unique
Remember
Funny
" Never fight an inanimate object. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Object
Fight
Funny
" One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. "
Samuel Johnson
Words
Funny
Man
" He was like a cock who thought the sun had risen to hear him crow. "
George Eliot
Thought
Funny
Him
" Stand up is really fun because if I think of a joke or a funny idea, then I can just go and tell some people and if they laugh, they laugh right away. "
Demetri Martin
Funny
Stand Up
Think
" The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl. "
Dave Barry
Building
Water
Universe
" Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves. "
Abraham Lincoln
Ability
Tact
See
" When a book leaves your hands, it belongs to God. He may use it to save a few souls or to try a few others, but I think that for the writer to worry is to take over God's business. "
Flannery O'Connor
Business
Book
Think
" Like almost everyone who uses e-mail, I receive a ton of spam every day. Much of it offers to help me get out of debt or get rich quick. It would be funny if it weren't so exciting. "
Bill Gates
Funny
Day
Rich
" The tax collector must love poor people, he's creating so many of them. "
Bill Vaughan
Love
Tax
Funny