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" As a foreigner in London, I like that there are so many other foreigners. "

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" But I don't distinguish between being laughed with, and laughed at. I'll take either. "

" I felt uncomfortable calling myself a writer until I started with 'The New Yorker,' and then I was like, 'Okay, now you can call yourself that.' "

" I've always been very upfront about the way I write, and I've always used the tools humorists use, such as exaggeration. "

" My family isn't really all that different from anyone else's. Well, maybe they're a bit more entertaining. "

" I cry all the time when I watch 'Glee' because I don't know if it's satire or melodrama and that makes me feel like the writing is aware of itself, and that makes it OK to cry. "

" I like listening to books as well, as that way you can iron at the same time. "

" Because I've always been a fairly nervous person. "

" There are lots of things that happen to me that I don't write about. "

" No one writes dialect better than Flannery O'Connor. No one should even try. "

" When you read comic material and people aren't laughing how do you know they're listening. "

" I sometimes read books on my iPad. "

" I guess my guilty pleasure would be listening to the British audio versions of the 'Harry Potter' books. "

" I don't think my life is more interesting than anybody else's. "

" I love 'Glee.' I cry all the time when I watch 'Glee' because I don't know if it's satire or melodrama and that makes me feel like the writing is aware of itself, and that makes it okay to cry. "

" What other people call dark and despairing, I call funny. "

" But most good movies have a gun in them. "

" Do I exaggerate? Boy, do I, and I'd do it more if I could get away with it. "

" I started writing one afternoon when I was twenty, and ever since then I have written every day. At first I had to force myself. Then it became part of my identity, and I did it without thinking. "

" I'm not a reporter but the 'New Yorker' treats everyone like a reporter. "

" My sister Tiffany told me years ago, 'You can never write about me.' Then she called six months ago and said she wanted to be in a story. She was worried people thought I didn't like her. "

" Lovers of audio books learn to live with compromise. "

" People ask if I miss it, but they don't understand that American culture is so ubiquitous that there's nothing to miss. I don't see myself moving back. It's not that I hate the United States. I just always thought it would be a shame not to live in a foreign country. "

" I always think it's a good policy to like the people who like you. "

" The only real advice you can give anyone is to keep writing. "

" I've never gone on Facebook and am not sure I understand it. The same goes for Twitter. I have someone sending tweets and pretending to be me, but I don't know why. "

" Actually I liked that 'Let the Right One In,' that Swedish vampire movie. "

" But I'm a humorist. I'm not a reporter, I never pretended to be a reporter. "

" I like books on tape, and will listen to just about anything. "

" I tend to show everything I do to my family, to check they won't be offended. "

" I just think that the people who say: 'That's not true' when someone tells a story at dinner are the people who didn't get any laughs when they told their story. "